Just ordered some sweets for DH...

I just ordered some things for DH from a company I have been seeing and was wanting to try... They have all kinds of Egyptian sweets, petite four, moushebic, burma... Things I can't make and DH likes. So I went out on a limb and ordered $50 woth of stuff from them. Insha'Allah I will review the products here on the blog once I get them. The company I used is:

Masri Sweets

And if they can save our friends from carrying moushebic all the way from Cairo I am definitely going to be a happy woman!LOL

It was a Monday alright...

So yesterday was a Monday around here... I went out to take the kids to school and fell on the ice. I do that every year at least once, and this was a big one because I was carrying the baby and I kinda held her in front of me so she wouldn't get hurt and her weight landed on top of me as well as mine. Alhamdulilah, winter is coming to a close.

Then, I delivered duplicates of bills that have not been paid yet to a big chain store here in town only to find out that they have gone to corporate billing and no one knows what the heck is happening with our money (which I really NEED right now). The kicker is that we can't stop delivering to them because the people who supply our papers would freak out about that.

So I got the truck to go pick up a development sign from the city... Only to find it frozen solid into the ground still in spite of warmer weather this past week or so. Then I go to get back into the truck only to find that it is locked. I must have hit the button getting out or something... But here was my 20 month old sitting in the running truck and the doors locked. Alhamdulilah, I had my phone... So I called a towing company that unlocked it for no charge to me. Masha'Allah, there are still some people out there who feel that a mother with a screaming toddler locked in the car is not a chance to collect $50.

In the afternoon, DH had a Drs appointment for a knee problem that he has been having. And they want to do a surgery on it. :P

Then all 6 of us are in line at Wal-Mart with two carts full of stuff and I go to pay only to realise that I have no cards... DH proceeds to get very upset that I came all the way to Wal-Mart without my cards. So I run back to the house thinking I will grab his cards and I find mine. Apparently, DH has taken the cards that I need from my wallet and has them in his car... Why??? Well, his cards from the same accounts are not working. I can only assume that he remembered that because when I showed up with the cards he was sitting at Subway with the kids eating dinner and he had even remembered the South Beach thing and gotten me a salad and a diet coke. LOL It was enough of a sorry for me... But I was a little flustered by the whole thing.

Yes dears... It was a Monday. Let's hope that Tuesday is a little more tame!LOL

Presentation

Layla's cultural heritage thing was Wednesday and Thursday... Since I've talked about it so much I thought I would share the finished project. Oh, and she wore one of my jilbabs. The funny thing was that of all the things we talked about she remembered one without fail. The Nile is 4,160 miles long. Funny what kids latch onto, huh?

Random Acts...

I have seen this on other blogs and I like the idea... So here it is. I have 5 things to give away to the first five people who comment asking for them. But, you have to remember to give me your e-mail so I can contact you for your snail mail info.

1)Something for a Muslimah.**UmmLayth**

2)Something for a person who is a kid at heart.**Amira**

3)Something for a person who tries to be green.**Rahma**

4)Something for an expectant mother (could be a new mother too).

5)Something for a hijabi.**UmmHana**

I will ship these things to you within a couple of weeks... All these things are handmade by yours truly;) So, don't let me down! Reply! Reply! Reply!!

Tag!!!

Mona (AKA MamaMona) tagged me sooo, here goes.

Assignment: Write 6 things everyone should do before they turn 18. Oh that seems so long ago...

Da Rules: List 6 actions or achievements you think every person should accomplish before turning 18.There are no conditions on what can be included on the list.At the end of your post, choose 6 people to get tagged and list their names.People who are tagged write their own blog entry with their 6 suggestions.Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged.

1)Get an education... And I don't just mean sit in school. Read, study a language, take outside courses in things...

2)Find a hobby that relaxes you, preferably something with your hands. Learn to sew, knit, paint, sculpt... Whatever. Just have something that you can learn and love so when you are an adult and you say, "I don't have time to take up a new hobby"... You have one to fall back on. They are great for stress relief.

3)Meet people from as many different cultures/backgrounds as possible. You have to get out of your little world in order to have an intelligent and rounded opinion in life. Cultivate it now.

4)Do something that takes you out of your comfort zone. I don't mean go do a pole dance at the local strip club or go on one of those girls gone wild tapes... I mean go to another country for the summer, join debate club even though you hate public speaking, volunteer at a nursing home even though you don't know what to say to the older generation... You have to learn to challenge yourself now before you get to old. Trust me, I have never seen anyone who never left their comfort zone run off and join the peace corp once they are 30.

5)Practice patience. You won't grow it spontaneously the day you turn 21. You have to learn to cultivate it now, and you will have a much better life if you can learn it.

6)Study world religion. Now, ah ah... Don't get all defensive on me about "You should be telling them to study Islam!!!" I am assuming you already know about Islam (although it doesn't hurt to brush up on the deeper subjects). But, if you are ever going to really have a conversation about why did you choose Islam... You have to have examined the other faiths first. I am not one for expecting people to understand our deen if we don't understand theirs.

I tag: hmmm, I don't know! Everyone has been tagged already!

THIS IS NOT EGYPT!!!

So in the middle of loan applications, selling cars and meeting with construction workers for the daycare this is the week that Layla's report on her heritage is due. On Wednesday she has her presentation and on Thursday we have to bring a snack/sweet that doesn't have nuts from the country she is presenting on.

As per my previous post DH was opposed (and still is) to the whole Egypt thing. I guess it comes down to feeling like the school has no business asking about relatives and family ties to other nations. He feels like they are gathering information from the kids in the name of education. I see where he is coming from. So, I bid on Germany but the teacher said that there are so many other people doing it that she would rather see Layla choose something else. So, I decided that there were some positives to doing Egypt and we are going with that.

I am going to try to focus on modern Egypt. Cairo to be specific (since that is where DH is from) and point out that it is a modern city blah blah blah. Maybe we can dispel some myths that Egypt is all about some guy on a camel taking tourists to the pyramids (although I do have the obligatory photos of said guy and me with my DD riding that camel). Since Discovery Channel and the like always seem to bring that. I mean, the average American probably thinks that Zahi Hawas is the only man that speaks English in Egypt!LOL

So, I am trying to think of something to cook... Grape leaves? Hmmmm. Also, I am going to play some modern Egyptian music. Hopefully my niece will be able to come through with some Mp3s for me. The one thing I am stumped on is clothes... She is supposed to wear something "traditional from the country she is presenting on. But what is "traditional" Egyptian dress? I don't think that DH will laugh if I put her in a jilbab, braids and a scarf with pom-poms around the edges!LOL I mean he's from Cairo guys... Traditional for him is what? A school uniform?LOL I'll have to think about that one some more. How can I represent without being all upper Egypt about it????

Where do we go from here?

I just got a phone call today from my 1st grader's teacher. Apparently he has been sent a disciplinary action form for the 3rd time... And this time he didn't bring it home.

**sigh**

I am ready to pull him from everything and move to a place where we can have a more peaceful, quiet life today. I am ready to chuck the ideas that DH has for all these business ventures and just run to Egypt and live by my SIL where I can have a simple existence. I think all the chaos in our house is at the root of this problem. He was fine last year.

So now I am asking myself should I push ahead with the plans we have... With the life that is keeping my husband in bed every hour of the day that he is at home? Or should I put my foot down and demand that things change? I have been seeing this anger in our DS... As a matter of fact I just spoke with my DH about it this morning over breakfast. He doesn't see it. He thinks our son is merely defending himself. I see uncontrolled aggression and I'm afraid it runs deeper than not liking school this year because I see it at home too.

I just hope our lifestyle (which is intended to provide a good life for our children in the future) doesn't ruin their lives now. I know it's been hard on me. I have been suffering from a deep depression for some time now... I can't let it touch my kids though, that would break my heart.

I think we are doing too much, fighting too much, and struggling too much. We need an easier life. We could have it. The question is will DH be willing to seek it?

Don't buy it!!! Make it!!!

The next time you feel the need to give the kiddos some playdough just make it yourself! I NEVER buy playdough;) You can even make your own and hand it out as party favors buy cutting it into chunky little shapes and putting it in little plastic gift bags.

Here are my favorite recipes:

Kool Playdough

3 cups Flour
1/2 cups salt
2 Koolaide packages
2 cups Boiling water

Mix the dry ingredients together. Add boiling water. Knead on floured board and add flour until desired consistency. This playdough will last for a long time when stored correctly.

Cooked playdough

2 cups flour
1 cup salt
2 tablespoons cream of tarter
2 cups of water
1 tablespoons mineral oil
food coloring

Mix all ingredients in a saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring until stiff. Allow to cool, then knead.

Another fun one is what I call goop.

Part 1
1 cup room temperature water
1 cup white school glue
Food coloring

Part 2
1 1/3 cups warm water
4 tablespoons Borax laundry booster

Mix parts in separate bowls. Pour the glue mix into the borax mix and don't stir. Just kinda roll it around until it firms up. Then take it out and knead it! Makes a fun gooey kinda dough.

Shoes and Souls...

So, Mama Mona (on the sidebar there) has inspired me to lay bare my shoe closet as I do agree with her idea that shoes can tell you something about a person... Here goes:


So let's start with my all time favorite since high school... Birks. Yes, I wear them all the time and with socks. Of course there are times when I have to leave them aside such as the dead of Wyoming winter... That's when I pick up these babies:


I also heart my Uggs. I have a suede pair like the ones pictured and a hard leather foot type to back it up on days when I can't wear the others. They are warm and comfy and wonderful in the winter.


Now if I must wear something that looks a little more formal I have my Dansko Professionals. I think they are comfortable and pass relatively undetected with a nice outfit. True story, I don't even own a pair of flats. I just wear these with dresses and everything. LOL

Someday I'm sure I'll have to grow up and get a more formal set of shoes... Then again maybe not. Oh, and of course my shoes are a dead giveaway that I am American wherever I travel... I don't think an Egyptian would even believe you if you told them what you pay for a pair of Birks!

Does not being able to get married make you a better Muslim?

Check out this article on the front page of the New York Times


There are two separate issues in the article as I see it, and the unfortunate part is that they have melted them into one... Well, and they made the return to practicing Islam in my generation of Egyptians seem like a bad thing.

I agree that the two main ideas that marriage is being blocked for many young people in Egypt and that many of the same generation are returning to practicing Islam are both true. BUT BOTH THINGS OCCERING DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE RELATED!!! Ugh. What's that they teach you in science about a positive correlation not always indicating cause and effect?

It is my opinion (since I can say that I have seen my DH's & SIL's friends all who married at a "normal" age) that there is no reason to believe that only people who don't get married are becoming more religious. All the people my DH grew up with are more religious now as adults. Most of them are more religious than even their parents, I know my DH and his younger sister are. I think that Egypt is just experiencing the normal swing of the pendulum when it comes to expressing your faith and practicing your deen. Now, I am no sociologist... But it seems like that is a natural thing in societies. We go from one extreme to another, and when the government came down hard on the brotherhood of Islam in Egypt it forced the pendulum to swing towards a very secular type behavior. Now, some of that has gone away and we are seeing people coming back to Islam for a variety of reasons. I don't think you can pinpoint it... For this guy maybe it's culture, and that girl it's political, and then that guy see's it as reclaiming something of his identity lost while he was young... Who knows. But to put it in such simplistic terms is well, being simple (which in this case means stupid).

I guess that I have a knee jerk reaction to these articles because on a gut level I feel like the implication is that Islam is for losers and if you were happy in your life you would never turn to this "extreme" religion. You'd just be happy like all those "moderate" (in this case I mean non-practicing) Muslims out there professing your Muslim identity and doing nothing different in your daily life because of it.

As usual, just my two piasters on the subject.

***Edit 2/19/08***
I read the article to DH and he had some thoughts. Mostly he wanted to say that not getting married until you are older does lead you back to the religion... Because that is what is at the heart of avoiding fornication. The longer you wait to marry the more opportunities you have to become sexually active and the more tempting it becomes. So, you focus on the salat, you fast you do dhiker. Basically you try to keep your mind off of this temptation.

He also mentioned that of all the things that are tempting this one is the worst, because it is a God given instinct and unlike drinking and other things that you might do in college this one could be legal under the right circumstances.

Finally, he and I have always talked about trying to be sure our children DON'T wait until their 30's to marry.

Anyway, just wanted to share the thoughts of an actual Egyptian male who DID wait until he was about 30 to marry... *WINK*

Dieting is hard!

I have been dieting for about a month (I think!LOL) and I just wanted to let you all know where I am at with that. The part about my dieting that sucks is that I can drop the first 10 lbs or so pretty fast, but the rest is an uphill road. So, I lost the most in the first weeks and now I am losing about 2lbs a week. I know that is actually what they reccomend... But it feels slow for the effort I have been making. Anyway, I know that I am not the only one on this whole weight loss journey... So I thought I would share, maybe some of you have had the same experience.

LESPORTSAC TOKIDOKI TRASPORTO BUON VIAGGIO BAG

I have not had a new purse in a long time. I have not had a REALLY NICE new purse since college. So, after several auctions... I finaly got the tokidoki bag I have been looking at!!! Yea E-Bay! I also won an auction on an expresso machine I have been wanting. So I guess now I can sip my homemade expresso drink in my to-go mug while I carry my new bag to take the kids to school!LOL

Building

Like many people who plan to move "back home" someday we have been planning to buy a building in Egypt instead of a house here in the states. Now, this all seems fine... But the details of such a purchase have been eluding us for the past 4-5 years. We talk to people, we consider, and then whatever plan we have gets pushed aside for other things. I am starting to wonder if it will ever actually happen!LOL I guess I wonder how we will ever accomplish this task. But, we are always looking at our lives here in the US as a stage and planning to invest in our future in Egypt. All our hard work here is for that Villa which we have never seen, and from my perspective at least, we don't really have the slightest idea about.

When I think about it, I wonder if we are doing the right thing? I'm sure there are other people who need things in this life more than I need a villa in Egypt. I don't even know that I have the right to such a house considering that the ummah is in a horrible state at the present time. Aren't there people in other nations that need food and shelter? Aren't there children whose parents can't afford to educate them? Aren't there families all over the world one step away from lifting themselves out of poverty and into a position where they could help not just themselves but others as well? Didn't the Prophet say:
"Muslims are one body. If any part of the body is suffering the whole body feels the pain."
And the Quran teaches us:
"And verily this Ummah of yours IS A SINGLE UMMAH and I am your Lord and Cherisher: Therefore Fear Me (and no other)." Quran 23:52

So, if we ever do have the money and the opportunity to build that villa... Insha'Allah we will make it an orphanage or a school for poor children instead... A clinic for people who have no money for medical care... A business for someone struggling to help his family escape poverty... In other words something that will help people in the best way we can. After all, we can be comfortable in the same apartment my DH grew up in, insha'Allah.

What do you think?

So, in my DD's school (as I have mentioned in the whole cultural heritage post) they are doing a unit on family and heritage. I have been OK with this until yesterday when my DD came home and said that the teacher insisted that she tell the class what god she believes in. Now I am a little irked by this, but apparently the entire class had to answer the question. So, I think it's not an appropriate discussion... But I might be inclined to let it slide. However, DD then went on to say that when she stayed late yesterday to finish an assignment the teacher asked her about it again. Now I'm mad. I am thinking about bringing it to the teacher and making sure that DD wasn't telling me the story in some way that makes it sound worse than it is... And then going to the principal with my feelings on 2-3rd graders entering into theological discussions under the name of cultural heritage.

I am not really prepared to put my daughter in the position of explaining the Islamic concept of God to her class, and as it stands I think she is somehow feeling like her classmates believe she is worshiping some foreign God called Allah. This really puts me in a bad position. So, dear readers... What would you do?

Another episode from Baba Ali

Go watch it!

But I'm not bitter...

We have been invited to an event today, an akeeka to be exact... And I don't want to go. I could think of a million reasons, but I think the sad truth is that I hate these women's rituals because I am bitter and jealous. You see I never had one.

I never had a big walimah(my MIL and SIL planned my wedding dinner and I didn't even invite anyone because it was so last minute and the whole thing was done w/o DH and I really being involved). And no one has visited me after any of my births. DH has never wanted to have an akeekah for our children... So I have never really had a princess for a day kinda experience to be honest. When my last child was born DH brought the kids to the hospital to visit me and we ended up in the family waiting room so he could take a nap in my bed. Our life has just not been conducive to these family rituals... We are always struggling, there is always work to be done.

Now, I don't wanna sound like I pouting (although I am!LOL) I guess I am trying to fess up. Yes, I hate celebrations because I am a bitter person who is just a little jealous. There, I said it. I feel better now.

Identity Crisis

My daughter has a "Cultural Heritage" project coming up at the end of February. She will have to set up a table and give a 10 minute presentation about the country her family is "from" (which can't be America) several times for a cultural fair that will be happening at her school. Groups will stop at each table and listen to the presentation then they will end the day by sharing food from each person's country. They have to do things like counting in the language of that country, singing a children's song from there, wearing traditional dress... Now, we are lucky in my estimation because we don't have to look back to a great great anyone... My husband himself can tell my DD about Egypt... I was all psyched because it is a fun chance for her to be proud of coming from such an interesting background... And she has even been there! But DH is boycotting the project. What's up with that????

Not at all Shocked...

You Are 96% Non Conformist

You're incredibly strange. And a weirdness like yours takes skill to cultivate! No one really understands you. And you're cool with that. You just hope you never have to understand them!

Are You a Nonconformist?

Yesterday I did the weekly shopping and found discounted blueberries at Wal-Mart and a flour grinding thing for whole wheat at the local co-op so I decided to make whole wheat blueberry crumb cake. Here's the recipe I came up with by tweaking a few recipes to add the whole wheat and fruit:

Whole Wheat Blueberry Crumb Cake

Cake
2 cups Whole Wheat Pastry Flour***
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp baking powder
4 Tbsp butter
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 cup milk
1 large egg
About 1 cup fresh blueberries

Topping
1/4 cup Whole Wheat Pastry Flour
1/2 cup packed Brown sugar
4 Tbsp butter

Heat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix flour, salt and baking powder and set aside. Then, cream butter and sugar. Add egg and milk to the butter and sugar mix. Then, mix in dry ingredients until moist (now it is important to note here that you may need to add a little milk if you live in a dry climate... Your cake should be like a muffin batter consistency if it is moist enough). Finally, add your blueberries and fold in gently. Pour into a greased 8X8 inch pan.

Now, take the topping ingredients and cut in the butter with either a fork or your food processor until the toping is crumbly. Don't overdo it!!! Sprinkle on top of your cake.

Bake for about 45 minutes. Top with powdered sugar if you like!

*** You will have better results if you use pastry flour. It is ground finer that "all-purpose" whole wheat. Most "all-purpose" whole wheat is ground for bread. For lighter baked goods you will want to use the pastry kind.

The importance of intention

After my hijab post I have been thinking about what it is that gets me about some of the things I see happening in the ummah. And the thing I am most concerned about is intention. I keep coming back to that as the root of all the things getting under my skin, causing me concern for my kids and the future of the ummah. Using the hijab thing as an example... I am worried that the intention of this type of hijab is to beautify, to fit into a culture... Not to please Allah(swt).

I am no scholar...Check out this article by Jamal Badawi for the scholar's thoughts on this subject. But, I just wanted to share my thoughts on intention...

“All actions are judged by motives, and each person will be rewarded according to their intention. Thus, he whose migration was to God and His Messenger, his migration is to God and His Messenger; but he whose migration was for some worldly thing he might gain, or for a wife he might marry, his migration is to that for which he migrated.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari, Saheeh Muslim)

Simply, if you are seeking the pleasure of Allah(swt) with your actions your reward is with Him... But if you are seeking the pleasure of people your reward is with them. Now when you think about this simple concept it will actually blow your mind... Because that means that you can't go to the jummah to please Allah(swt) and to further your standing in the community since you are running for some position on the Masjid board or something. How many of us have purified our intentions to that extent? Think of the following...

“A person learned [religious] knowledge and taught it [to others], as well as reciting the Quran. He will be brought [to the presence of God], and God will mention to him all the favors he granted him, and he recognized them. God will ask him, ‘What did you do with them?’

He will answer, ‘I learned [religious] knowledge and taught it [to others], and I recited the Quran purely for Your sake.’

God will say, ‘You have lied! Rather you learned [religious] knowledge to be called a scholar, and you recited the Quran to be called a recitor, and it was said of you!’ Then it was commanded [to punish] him. So he was dragged on his face and he was thrown into the Fire.” (an-Nasa’i)


Whoa, and what about this? I think it really shows how Islam emphasizes intention in our lives:

If somebody intends to do a good deed and he does not do it, then Allah will write for him a full good deed in his account with Him; and if he intends to do a good deed and actually did it, then Allah will write for him in his account with Him, from ten to seven hundred times to many more times its reward. And if somebody intended to do a bad deed and he does not do it, then Allah will write a full good deed in his account with Him; and if he intended to do a bad deed and actually did it, then Allah will write one bad deed in his account." (Al-Bukhari)


Of course as with all things in Islam, there is a great mercy to consider... I think of the following hadith whenever I get down on myself for not having more time for worship:

“If he is working to support his small children, then it is for the sake of God. If he is working to support his elderly parents, then it is for the sake of God. If he is working to occupy himself and keep his desires in check, then it is for the sake of God. If, on the other hand, he is doing so to show off and earn fame, then he is working for the sake of Satan.” (al-Mundhiri, as-Suyuti)


I guess what I am trying to say is that it isn't what people are doing as much as why... I worry about WHY they are doing these things. If you are doing things to please the people around you, there is no reward in it. Now I am not saying that I know what is in people's hearts, because I don't. But, if what I suspect is true... We are in some real trouble.

So, I am trying (and I hope you will to) to purify my intentions. I want to examine them, control them. This is not an easy task, but a jihad that must be undertaken by every Muslim.

Say: "Whether ye hide what is in your hearts or reveal it, Allah knows it all: He knows what is in the heavens, and what is on earth. And Allah has power over all things. (Aal `Imran 3:29)

Go ask Baba Ali!!!

Check out the new Ummah Films Ask Baba Ali... This is the first episode, insha'Allah there are more coming!!!

Family nights

This image is an update on 2/3. A picture of my cowboy boot cake;)

For some time we were doing fun Fridays around our house... And once the kids went to school I just kinda let it drop. But I have decided to revive the idea and make it Saturday instead. So, tomorrow we are having a western night. Big people will end the evening with 3:10 to Yuma once little people go to bed;)

I'm making a cowboy boot cake, sheriff’s badge cookies, BBQ with baked beans and cornbread, and maybe some bandana napkins... And I will serve it all in camping gear type tins. I think I will try to get some cheapo cowboy hats too, and have you ever made those paper grocery bag vests? I'm going to do those... Plus some sculpie badges that the kids will make.

Anywhoo, you might want to try it if you have kids who are young enough not to think it's silly!LOL I know I have fun with it!LOL

More photos...

Well I seem to be in a picture mood these days, so here we are...

Here's a doll I crocheted a few months ago. Yes I know, no face. I only like representational stuff like maybe buttons and I tried some on her and it just didn't look right...


Here's some steps in a little ground beef filled bird's nest bread thingi I made today... First you use a cookie cutter that makes a cookie about as big as your plam..


Then you push them into cupcake molds and fill the empty center with the graound beef mixture. You can either close the edges or leave them open at that point.


And, tada! All baked up!


And here's a crumb cake I saw on Mama Mona's blog that I just had to make today too... Even though I can't eat it since I'm DIETING!!!!

a couple of pictures to share...

Just wanted to share the day in pictures...

This one is my youngest standing in front of the washer crying as she ponders the fate of her blankie rolling around in the washer.


This is some one evening mittens that I made knitting with two needles... I was inspired by Surviving's craft blog to make some wool mittens for the kids and I found out they were quicker than I ever imagined! I found the pattern on
THIS SITE. I'm making a set for every kid, insha'Allah.

What is hijab?

There is no doubt that we women want people to look at our clothing and say, "Allllaaahhh! Where did you find that outfit?" And this includes us hijabis. But, we have to remember that the purpose of hijab is to protect us from people looking at our beauty... So does the new style I am seeing in Egypt protect or accent our beauty?

Is this hijab?


OK, well what about this?


Or this?


Now I am not an all or nothing gal when it comes to hijab. All I ask is that you understand the definition of hijab in your heart and mind even if you are not wearing it properly. You do what you can at the moment. It's between you and Allah(swt). So, if all you can do is loose clothing and tie your hair back in a bun... Go ahead, bravo. If you can wear niqab, good for you, bravo. I am not going to be the sister to even ask you about it and I certainly know that there are women in minimal hijab that are more pious than the sisters in full out niqab, Allahu'Alim. As much as I love to see magazines geared toward hijabis like the one I ganked these images from, I wonder if we are giving off the wrong impression about hijab??? Are we supporting sisters who wear it or chastsising them for wearing it and not still looking hot? Hmmmmmmm.

This is me at my walimah. I wore hijab... And my SIL was so sad when I didn't wear the viel she brought for me (one like in the above pictures) but I felt like I had to strike a compromise between looking good at my walimah and going so far from the principle of hijab that I might as well just take it off for the event (which was suggested BTW by my in-laws who should know better).


So I come to the questions that are milling in my mind as I read these magazines... Is the look of the stylish hijab a gateway for young women scared to go all out and look frumpy? Or, is it too tempting to let these images redfine hijab in a way that takes us away from its core purpose... Shielding our beauty?

When I think of hijab, and what is happening to it I think of a few verses/hadith:

Sayyiduna Abu Hurayra (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said: “There are two types of people who will enter the Hell-fire, whom I have not (as yet) seen: People having whips similar to ox-tails with which they will beat people, and (secondly) women who will be dressed yet appear to be naked. They will seduce men and be inclined towards them. Their heads will be like the swaying humps of bacterial camels. They will neither enter paradise, nor smell its fragrance, even though its fragrance can be smelt from such and such distance.” (Sahih Muslim, no. 2128)

Narrated AbuHurayrah: A woman met him and he found the odour of perfume in her. Her clothes were fluttering in the air. He said: O maid-servant of the Almighty, are you coming from the mosque? She replied: Yes. He said: For it did you use perfume? She replied: Yes. He said: I heard my beloved AbulQasim (peace_be_upon_him) say: The prayer of a woman who uses perfume for this mosque is not accepted until she returns and takes a bath like that of sexual defilement (perfectly).

And of course the verse that defines hijab in the Quran...

“And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear therof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands’ fathers, their sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers, or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons, or their women or the servants whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex, and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O you Believers, turn you all together towards Allah, that you may attain Bliss.” (Quran 24:31).

These are the things that run through my head when I look in the mirror. Those are the words that ring in my ear as I reach for the perfume bottle in my vanity. I wonder what verses are going through the minds of the people who make these magazines? Or is hijab for them reduced to a fasion statement?

****edit****
Since it was brought to my attention that I might not be clear... The first picture is meant to be a hijabi dressing up, I have no problem with that one at all. It was one of a handful in the magazine that actually were pretty much hijab for me.



5 things you may not know about toddler nursing...

Since I am currently nursing a toddler, I thought I might do a post about extended breastfeeding... Then I thought there are many great places on the web to read about it....Kelly Mom, LLL... So I will settle for this short list. And I hope if you are nursing a toddler you will proudly answer YES I AM! the next time someone asks you if you are still(insert surprised and annoyed voice here) nursing.

5. Toddlers will usually nurse less frequently than infants. In other words you won't be nursing every 2 hours if you have a toddler!LOL

4. There are many times that nursing is the only thing between mothers of nursing toddlers and insanity. Ahh yes, the power of oxytocin!

3. Other people might think you are slightly insane. Oh yeah, you probably already know that one...

2. Toddlers are still getting many benefits from nursing, emotional as well as physical. Three cheers for mommy's antibodies, yeah!

1. In many parts of the world nursing past the first year is (gasp!) NORMAL, and the World Health Organisation actually RECOMMENDS it.

What's up in Ummlayla's world

Well, I have been flirting with the idea of getting serious about losing some weight for a long time now... I hit 150 (and I am only 5 feet tall) which is more than I weighed when I was pregnant with my kiddos and I decided the time is now. So, I am doing the whole South Beach Diet thing, and I hate fad diets but I need a jump start really.

I am hoping to drop about 35lbs... Which will take time of course. I am also going to start going to a pilates class and maybe yoga a few days each week. I hate that I have let it go this far. But I love food, and DH does too... So our recreation is cooking and eating or even just eating out. I have never been this heavy and I am miserable with it. So wish me luck ladies! I'm gonna need it!LOL

Oh, any weight loss tips/thoughts/otherwise?

Computer trouble...

Well, that's not really what my computer trouble is of course... But something like that could and would happen to me! Once my computer was out of commission for 2 weeks because some little gremlins (aka my children) popped off all the keys while I was on the phone. Creative, huh?

Well... Right now I am having some trouble getting the lap top to hook up to the plug cord to charge the battery or just use outlet power... So I am looking to get it repaired or maybe just replaced so I can give this one to the kids.

Anyway, if I am neglectful... It's not my fault! The computer may just have finally died, or gone to the shop for a long rest! I think I am getting to that point very soon... We'll see how much longer it will hold on like this!

*****Edited on 1/7/08******
Well, thanks to DH I went to Denver and got a new laptop! Yeah DH! We were able to get some of the upgrades I have been looking for like a DVD burner and what-not... So it all turned out well in the end, alhamdulilah. My dad is fixing the old one to give to the kiddos, insha'Allah.

UmmLayla gets Mortified

http://www.getmortified.com/book/
I suspect that many of you fellow bloggers kept a diary/journal when you were you angsty teens... I think most bloggers are writers at heart, and many people who like to put thought to pen keep a journal...

Anywhoo, I wanted to share with you a book that I found at The Virgin Megastore in FL, Mortified. It's the journal entrees of teens and preteens that originally found life as a stage play. I really enjoyed it and it inspired me to go to my dad's house and dig up my journals that I kept from about 9-18 years of age... And in true keeping with the spirit of the book, I will share an entry from one with you:


Thursday, April 5th 1990
Well, all's quiet on the (my last name) front! Yesterday, I did well in the lacrosse game. I'm definitely not in danger of losing my position (as team goalie). And I asked Alex if he likes Jenna. He didn't even freak out he just said, "Yeah, but only as a friend." totally calm and serious. So I'm sure he's not lying. Oh baby, my man and my position are safe! At OM (Olympics of the Mind) Alex and I both cut our fingers up with those retractable razor blades while we were cutting some cardboard. It didn't really hurt, but my mom wants me to get a tetanus shot since I haven't had one in ten years and the razor was so dirty. Oh well, I'm sure I won't die. I'm getting lazier and lazier as the end of the year gets closer. Soon I'm gonna just veg out! Speaking of veggin out, just about a month ago I became a vegetarian. It may seem odd but I feel better and I feel like I'm not hurting anything for my food and that's a good feeling. I've pysched myself out so much to refrain from meat that even the thought of eating animal flesh appals me! It's odd, before I loved steak and chili and chicken pot pie and turkey breast. but now I couldn't dream of touching it to eat. But in science I'll still dissect and stuff, I have to!!!!! What good would a doctor who didn't be?

Thursday, April 12th 1990
Whoa! Today has been just a blowout! I went off on the OM team about screwing around and not getting anything done. And at practice Jill (the coach) asked Selena (a teammate) and I to talk to the lacrosse team about their "bad attitude" towards practice lately. I was glad though they all really shaped it up afterwords. OM was different. Alex has decided that he kinda likes Jenna. (Bleah!) So he has to show off for her and screw around and shit and I'm getting sick of it. He can be cool though. Like tonight he rode home with us and i had on glasses and he actually told me I looked good in them. It was cool. but his shit with Jenna is gonna piss me off. I just hope he'll get over it pretty quick. Jenna likes Jason anyway. I don't know, I hope he grows to hate her!j/k (just kidding)

Adult me says...
I was about 15 when I wrote those. See I told you I was a geek. Olympics of the mind and all! LOL Seriously, I never even dated Alex... But I would've been smart to, last I heard he was at MIT;)

____________________________________________________


Now fellow bloggers, I am challenging you to get mortified! Pull out that journal and post a page or too, come on. If I can do it you can. Leave me a comment if you are planning to do, it would be cool to make the challenge on your blog too if you do. I'm waiting!!!!

Name that Daycare!

OK, so we are all over the place with a name for the daycare... I think it should be a little cheeky... Or just a nod to the fact that it's a Waldorf style school. I'm extreme that way. No babyland, kiddie kastle, or anything cheesy like that for me.

So I was thinking of the name: Shmoosville, or Shmoo Valley as in shmoo from the lil'Abner cartoon. Check it out... Here's a shmoo site.

What do you think?

I think I need a faith lift...

Friends, I have a request. I am way out of the loop here in cowboy country. So if you hear of an Islamic convention, a learning oppertunity, a great book... Please pass it on. I am thirsting for Islam. No really. I am just parched. So give a sister a cool drink, huh?

Flying While Muslim

This is me, looking fairly annoyed as DH argues with the lady at the Delta counter over CHARGING US when we missed our flight because we were selected by them for a "random" security check.

I have no problem with security checks. And if you want to just say that you are going to check every passenger you suspect might be Muslim/Arab... Do it. But just ADMIT that is what you are doing. We flew Delta (something I will never do again) and were "randomly" selected for extra security on every flight we took. Now, I wouldn't even mind... But my last name is different and I NEVER got selected... Sure, random. Now, on our return we checked in at 6, with baggage out of the way and everything and proceeded to our 7:30 flight. That is when my 6 year old's shoes set off the mass spectrometer (those sniffer machines) and we were detained for the next hour+. We told them throw the shoes away. We told them we are late to our flight... DH ranted about the research project he was involved in building such machines and how they were not that great yet anyway. We waited for an endless parade of supervisors who were unsure what to do in this situation and finally our son's name was logged in some security violation book and we were on our way.

Now, Delta seems to take their time of departure seriously because we missed our flight by a few minutes. The same thing happened to us when making a connection on the way to FL... Silly really that they don't wait if a passenger is making a connection or already checked into a flight. Really silly.

Now, there we are at the Delta counter... We are looking at the next day we discover and I start calling hotels. I regret returning the rental car. I wonder what my DH will do about his work. Then the Delta lady hits us with $75 a ticket to get the new flight. WHAT? Oh no, it gets worse. DH gets the supervisor and she tells us that she is "doing us a favor" since they weren't "real tickets". Oh great. Well, we paid real money for them! So, apparently the Delta policy is that if you buy your tickets through Priceline or a discount ticketing company you are SOL if you miss your flight. The tickets are only good for that flight and that flight only.

Well, I can't say I'm surprised. I can't say I didn't expect to have every crevice of my baggage inspected. But I didn't think I'd be paying over $500 for it!!! UGH. I hate Delta. I hate "random" security checks.

The funny thing is I was gonna go postal on the first flight when we got delayed and I started to go on about these checks not being random and just as the poor security lady is telling me that the airlines select people DH says "cool down, stop!" Then the next day as we got "randomly" selected again DH starts going postal!LOL So I told him, "Gee honey, cool down!" After that there was something about shoes and something else about random and a final thought about how these checks were stupid because the machine that said the night before my son's shoes contained traces of explosives registered nothing the next morning. Ohhhh my. I guess we will be leaving for the airport a whole day early if we go to Egypt this year!LOL

I'm Baaack!

We are back from Florida... I have so many post I owe about traveling while Muslim, the Disney empire, my DH vs other Egyptian men of his generation and just about 100 other random things. This was a computer free vacation though... So I am just getting to it all. Insha'Allah you will be hearing from me this week lots!LOL

YAAAAHOOOOWWWEEEE!

If you know me, you know that we have been dying to take a vacation. We wanted to go for the last Eid... And that was shot down by a shortage of workers for my DH's business (what's new?). Soooo, here we are at the next Eid and DH's friend from Egypt is going to be in Florida... So we start debating the trip. We look at tickets, we do math, we wait... And all the time the deal keeps getting sweeter from the friend (who is a nice guy, masha'Allah). "Diab, I have a second suite with a kitchen..." "Diab, I have a rental car until the 22nd." "Diab, I can get 4 free tickets to Disney." OK!! OK!! We're coming!!!

So, we leave to Florida early tomorrow morning. I'm off to pack! Wheeee!

Come on, it's funny!

Saw this on Mamamona's and I had to give it a try!

Kids Will Do Anything For The Egyptian's Wife.

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Hmmm, not my kids but it sounds good!LOL

The Sweet You Can't Eat Without The Egyptian's Wife.

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Well, if you're gonna eat sweets AROUND me you're gonna eat them WITH me!

Tell Them About The The Egyptian's Wife, Mummy.

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Get it, Egyptian... Mummy... Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk

The Egyptian's Wife Makes Everything Better.

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I do, I do, and I'm incredibly humble as well!

Why can't we learn from them?

OK, so I was all set to rant about why don't we Muslims have youth groups and things that would help us entice our children to learn more about the deen and befriend other Muslims from their generation... When I found this
Muslim youth group in southern California. Bravo. Masha'Allah. So, I hope this is the beginning of a trend... Insha'Allah there will be youth groups all over the place when my kids are older... Well, there will be... Right?

I have struggled since I converted with the tendency of the Muslim community to adapt this attitude of complacency when it comes to teaching the deen. It seems like we just assume that the deen will teach itself. That it will jump out of the pages of the Quran and grab our children and community members in. And while I can't deny that it has happened... I think we owe our communities and families more in the way of teaching the religion. And I don't mean dogma, I mean giving them the tools to reach a deeper level of commitment and understanding of the deen.

Also, I have struggled with the lack of community in Islam. There seems to be these little ethnic groups and everyone else just falls into the cracks. And by everyone I mean second generation immigrants, people from mixed backgrounds and of course converts. I know, I know, people from the mosque are all up in your business in some places... But I rarely see it as constructive, actually it is usually quite the opposite. I have seen communities that seem to specialise in divorcing people... Astagfurallah.

You have to admit that as a fixture in the religious landscape of the USA we are pretty new. There are groups that have been doing this for a long time and maybe they have some ideas that we could adapt for ourselves. I guess what I'm getting at is why can't we learn from other groups that have these things nailed? I look at the Evangelical Christians... Wow, they have got the youth thing going. And I know the LDS folks here where I live have caring for their community down to a science.

Look, ISLAM is perfect... No one said Muslims are. Just something to think about.

Keep me in your dua...

Please keep me in your dua. Our daycare project goes before city council AGAIN today. Insha'Allah, it will go well and we can move on with the the actual construction. We have been busting our butts getting a petition signed and talking to different people about it, so we've done what we can in regards to showing that people support this. It's with Allah(swt) now and we are ready for whatever he has planned for us.

Update: Back from city council... We got it! ALHAMDULILAH!

My kingdom for a bag?

OK, if all women are either shoe whores or bag hags.... Usually I am a shoe whore. Shoes were really the thing I spent money on, and even still nothing covers my stubborn foot that costs less than $100. Only now I can afford only 1-2 pairs a year!LOL

I find myself coveting these tokidoki bags big time... But can a mom of three really spend $200 on a bag? Well, maybe in my next life!LOL

Edit... Mom to three? Wow, I really am sleep deprived!LOL Four. Mom of Four.

I know I'm a geek...

When your day is ruined by the inability to make your i-pod sync so you can listen to all your talk radio/podcasts for the day you know:

A. You are a hopeless geek
B. You are totally anti-social
C. You are on the edge

OK, I confess! Now will my stupid i-pod work already!!!!

No words...

13 Year-old Girl Commits Suicide After Cyber-bullying
What do you say about the tragic suicide of a young girl who was only 13. To make it worse, she did it because she just broke up with a boy. And worse? Said boy never existed. It was the mom of another girl in the neighborhood who just wanted to see what was being said about her daughter online.

Is setting up a fake myspace page and posing as a boyfriend to a girl this young a crime? If she kills herself over the relationship is it a crime then? I was listening to something about this on NPR this afternoon and I got to thinking about it. I thought about it a lot. Where are we headed when a mother would do this to another woman's child? Even if she had no idea the girl would end her life over the break-up how sick is it to do something like that to a younger person? Where is the wisdom that comes with age in this country? Does something have to be defined as a crime so we will know it is hideous and wrong? I'm just so sad.

Is Sneaky Good?

So I went and purchased the book Sneaky Chef which has been the topic of conversation in many parenting type magazines, shows, forums and so on. Initially I admit the idea was appealing. Hmmm, feed them good food with no argument? Why not. Then I got to thinking about it. Masha'Allah, my kids eat a wide variety of foods and I don't think I have much to worry about really. But even if they didn't I'm not so sure this is the answer. A scene of a well meaning mother delivering her sneaky meals to a malnourished 23 year old popped into my head.

Isn't it our job as parents to give our children tools to go on and be successful in life? I'm not saying that sneaking in a nutrient or two is wrong... But isn't it far better to teach them that there will be a way of preparing a less than desirable veggie that they might like? What about offering them alternate sources of said nutrient. OK, you don't like chicken... Maybe you like eggs. You don't like brussel sprouts... Maybe you'll like stuffed cabbage leaves.

I guess what I'm getting at is where are we going with this? Will our son's wives be passed this torch on the wedding night... "I know you are in love with my son and you want the best for him... So you should know he has never eaten a vegetable plain in his entire life. What you should do if you want him to be healthy is puree them and put them in all his food. Here's how:" I just can't imagine that a fussy eater who has been allowed to eat to his/her preferences for so many years will suddenly mature into a vegetable eating adult. I might be wrong about that... But I don't want to risk it.

Seeing this and thinking about the pediasure commercials just makes me sad for the children of today. We (my generation) seem to be pampered brats raising even more pampered brats. Where does it end? No wonder the waiters look at me strange when my kids ask for salad. Sheesh.

Turkey Jerky?

Well, I am not usually one to bag on someone else's culinary efforts... But DH's sister insisted that we drive three hours to her house for a Thanksgiving dinner (something we don't even celebrate) because she has her daughter this year. Well, I didn't really want to go and DH reassured me that her turkey would be good because she was just cooking it in an oven bag.

So, I didn't make dinner and we headed out at our usual dinner time. Well, we got there starving only to find the weirdest Thanksgiving dinner ever. The turkey had been cooked early in the AM (because she sleeps all day and is only up at night) and left on warm all day. Yes, from 5am to 8pm on warm. It had collapsed into a pile of turkey jerky. And she had taken off the skin and spiced the heck out of it... Why? Then the side dishes... Microwaved frozen veggies with dried Italian spices (again, why?) and the weirdest spiced rice ever. It was brown from the amount of spices and tasted like biting into a clove. And that's it. Oh yeah, Jello brand gelatin (not cool, but she doesn't believe gelatin from pigs is haram and she and I are constantly fighting over it... Her daughter will be horking down skittles and I have to be like, "no kids, we can't eat that because it has gelatin.") which was 3/4 eaten by her daughter with the spoon still sitting in the bowl. Good grief!!! I have never seen anything like it I swear. So, to recap... Turkey jerky, rice no one could eat, frozen veggies, and 3/4 eaten jello we couldn't eat. What?

OK, enough complaining. At least I got to shop the sales and go to Costco (club size organic products at good prices, yeah!). I hope your holiday weekend was a little better.

UmmLayla in the news!!!

So look at the front page of the local paper... Above the fold I might point out.

It's a little article about a project we have going, I would've scanned it but my all-in-one is acting up (what's new?).