Whole foods and the yum factor

We eat for so many reasons beyond fueling our bodies. As a mom working towards good eating habits I try to remember that the social and emotional aspects of food are important and just as real as the practical considerations such as cost and nutrition. As I plan for the daycare I am trying to keep this in mind. So, I have started to rethink my stand on hiding foods... My own children I can cagoule, bribe and force if needed. Other peoples children in a large setting... No.

I have been observing in another daycare here in town and am seeing that kids just have their own minds about what they eat. And if they have never been exposed to whole foods how will I get them to eat it? Some things I know won't be a big deal, but other things will be a struggle I'm sure. So I am thinking about hiding veggies in the cooking for the daycare. Of course I would point this out to the parents, but I am thinking it might be a good way to have kids actually eat their veggies rather than just throwing them in the trash.

I have been experimenting with some different recipes and I think there are some with real potential. Even my picky DH liked them. I made a veggie soup with meatballs, blueberry bars with spinach, sweet potato pancakes, and will keep trying more options, insha'Allah. Hopefully I will have this down pat within a few months. Once I open the daycare I will be able to incorporate this idea... I will just have to figure out the transition to a larger scale.

***Somehow the draft of this post published... I just now got to editing it, sorry guys!***

I want you all to watch this weeks Ask Baba Ali video. I think it brings up an important point. A VERY important point. We have all seen this in the masjid, we all know on some level what he is talking about. It's up to us to stop it. OK, so watch it them come read the next piece of this post.

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You saw it? OK.

How many times have you been that person complaining? How many times have you been the person with the clipboard? I've been both. Lately I've been the complainer more often, to be honest. And I am thinking that the next time there is something that needs to be done I will just do it, insha'Allah. And I have been thinking a lot about the things that have happened to me in the masjid and thinking that I reacted in the wrong way.

You see I have had some bad experiences with the masjid as far as talking about me, making me feel uncomfortable, saying things to the congregation that were obviously addresses to me... And all I have ever done is complain about it. Not very productive really. I shouldve gone to the people who were doing these things and told them my concerns to their face. Because you see, that is the difference between voicing a legitimate concern and complaining. No one that I have told my stories to can help me with my problem, and I think may have been guilty of using this whining as a way of dealing with my problems. Now, if I had just gone and talked to the people involved I'm sure they would've denied any wrongdoing... But I would have made them think twice before ever doing it again to me or anyone else.

So, here's to picking up a paintbrush instead of running your mouth off. I know I'm going to do my best to implement this idea, insha'Allah.

I love a company with customer service

When we were in FL DH bought everyone Crocs with the Disney logo in the place of the openings. We were seeing them all over Disney and telling DH I was planning on buying them for the kids. I always have them for the kids summer shoes. So, our last day at Disney without me or the kids to try anything on... He bought 5 pairs of Crocs. 3 of them were the wrong size, including mine. Since there was very little chance of me growing into them, I e-mailed the company to see if maybe I could get another size. Now, I had very little hope in this endeavor since I bought them at Disney. Imagine my shock when I actually got a response. And imagine how happy I was when I got my new shoes in the mail yesterday? I am recommending Crocs highly. I was impressed when a friend got a replacement pair after her daughter's brand new Crocs ripped. But she took them back to the place she bought them at with the receipt blah blah blah. After my situation, I am thinking they are a great company... I for one am impressed with their customer service.

Said I would review it...

So, DH has been enjoying our order from Masri Sweets for a few days now... But he says that it leaves something to be desired. The filo dough treats were good, but the moushebik and the petit four were only OK. I could've made the petit four, and that is my gold standard.... And DH claims that the moushebic is of the homemade variety. Maybe we are spoiled by the things we get from Misr... Who knows. Basically if I can make it I don't want to pay for it. So I don't think I would give it a thumbs down, "it didn't suck" to quote Showgirls. But, I think I will keep trying different companies.

Halfway mark...

When I started dieting I was 151 lbs. Way too much for my 5 feet... Just too much. My goal is to make it to 110. This week I hit 130, which means I am halfway to my goal, masha'Allah. There have been setbacks, stalls and I have started longingly at many deserts during that time. However, I feel like I am getting somewhere with this whole weight loss thing... I feel better, my clothes fit, and even though I don't see a big difference in the mirror DH keeps reassuring me that he can see it.

I have been doing a modified South Beach plan. I keep the carbs low, the fiber high. I am getting bored with it though. I wish I could say there is no problem with limiting myself, and I don't miss the foods I have cut out... But I do. I think that I will be able to maintain my weight with more carbs, but to keep losing I have had to limit them. Unfortunately, there are only so many ways you can prepare a chicken breast!LOL And I miss cereal for breakfast!!!

Anyway, just an update on the diet thing... I'm still at it!

Time for an Alhamdulilah...

I am having a good day in spite of all the things we have hanging over our heads... So I wanted to take time for an Alhamdulilah...

Alhamdulilah for the part that just came for my new espresso machine. I can now finally use it and enjoy a nice cuppa.

Alhamdulilah for a DH who has the money and the patience to help me when I overdraw our bank account for the billionth time.

Alhamdulilah for kisses on the neck from someone I love **blushing**

Alhamdulilah for a sweet baby that takes a morning nap with me when I really need it.

Alhamdulilah for the guy who fixed my glasses in 10 minutes at no charge so I don't have to wear my horrible back-ups all day.

Alhamdulilah for driving away from yet another rental that will never work for us and stumbling onto another place to rent that I think is perfect for us.

Alhamdulilah for spring weather, while it lasts.

A funny from Masr...

Mubarak was on his death bed and by his side was his closest advisor, Ahmed. As Mubaruak was slipping in and out of consciousness he carried on a conversation with Ahmed about his final wishes...

He says, "Ahmed, we have talked about it many times... But tell me what will you do with my presidency when I pass on?"

"Sir, don't worry. As you wish your presidency will pass to your son Gamal!!! Rest now sir, it will be as you have planned."

Mubaruk sleeps and wakes again asking desperately; "Ahmed, Ahmed!!! And what will happen to the Egyptian people after I pass?"

"Don't worry sir, those ungrateful Egyptians will eat rocks after you die!!!"

Mubarak sleeps and then wakes again with one last desperate question: "Ahmed, Ahmed!!! What about my younger son? Do you remember my plans for him?"

"Of course sir, of course. He will get the exclusive contracts to sell the rocks!!!"

NYUK NYUK NYUK.... Well, I though it was funny anyway;)

Fire Suppression... Or Financial Oppression?

Masha'Allah we have finally figured out about 90% of the work that needs to be done with the daycare. Now I have one ginormous hurdle remaining... The fire code. Ahhhh, the fire code. Well, it seems that we are the first daycare in WY to have to retrofit a building to meet a new code for daycares and schools. No one knows what this code is, no one has enforced this code before. All the other daycares have been grandfathered in. ** SIGH**

So, right now I don't know what this is going to cost me or how long it will take to install. I have to be up and open by the June though... Or I have to renew my conditional use. So, keep us in your dua because we need it!LOL

After school snack

I found a cupcake mix from Betty Crocker today at the store... And since I have been thinking of trying to make half a cake mix or something to be able to cut down the number of cupcakes I make at one time, it was perfect. The mix made 12 cupcakes and I used whipped cream infused frosting for a fluffy top. They remind me of clouds, don't you think?

Check it out!

Arab-American style Wal-Mart in Dearborn, MI. I have some issues with Wal-Mart (and what they do to small businesses), but that is cool!!! Read the article here:Wal-Mart in Dearborn

Just a little funny...

Tonight DH was out while I was making dinner. I made little mini pizzas with the kids and a small deep dish pizza in a cake pan for DH. I was feeding the kids and called to ask him if he wanted mushrooms and olives on his pizza. He said something like yea, sure. I told him the kids made their own, I put extra cheese on his... Blah Blah Blah.

Then he came home with a pizza. "I thought you asked me to get a pizza on my way home." he says. Yet more evidence that men don't listen to their wives on the phone!!!LOL

Koushari recipe

All this talk of koushari lately... It's easy!!! So here is my personal recipe:

1 cup brown lentils
1 cup short grain rice
1 cup uncooked pasta (elbow macaroni is best)
1 large onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 tablespoons oil
1 can tomato sauce
1/2 tsp coriander
1/4 teaspoon crushed red chili pepper flakes (or more to taste)
salt and black pepper

Cook the lentils in just over a 5 cups of salted water. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat and simmer, covered, for 15-30 minutes, depending on the type of lentils you are using. Keep checking and add water if needed.

At the same time cook up some rice using a 1 cup rice to 2 1/2 cups water ratio. I measure the water and the rice with the same cup.

Cook the macaroni in a separate pot like you normally would. Rinse and strain when done.

Meanwhile, fry the onions and garlic in the oil until golden. At the very last minute of frying add the coriander. Then just pour the tomato sauce on and simmer.

Mix the lentils, rice and macaroni together in one pot.

Add about a tbsp of vinegar to the sauce after you take it off the burner.

Place some of the lentil mixture on each plate and top with tomato sauce.

Sprinkle with hot chili powder or salt and pepper, if desired.

Just ordered some sweets for DH...

I just ordered some things for DH from a company I have been seeing and was wanting to try... They have all kinds of Egyptian sweets, petite four, moushebic, burma... Things I can't make and DH likes. So I went out on a limb and ordered $50 woth of stuff from them. Insha'Allah I will review the products here on the blog once I get them. The company I used is:

Masri Sweets

And if they can save our friends from carrying moushebic all the way from Cairo I am definitely going to be a happy woman!LOL

It was a Monday alright...

So yesterday was a Monday around here... I went out to take the kids to school and fell on the ice. I do that every year at least once, and this was a big one because I was carrying the baby and I kinda held her in front of me so she wouldn't get hurt and her weight landed on top of me as well as mine. Alhamdulilah, winter is coming to a close.

Then, I delivered duplicates of bills that have not been paid yet to a big chain store here in town only to find out that they have gone to corporate billing and no one knows what the heck is happening with our money (which I really NEED right now). The kicker is that we can't stop delivering to them because the people who supply our papers would freak out about that.

So I got the truck to go pick up a development sign from the city... Only to find it frozen solid into the ground still in spite of warmer weather this past week or so. Then I go to get back into the truck only to find that it is locked. I must have hit the button getting out or something... But here was my 20 month old sitting in the running truck and the doors locked. Alhamdulilah, I had my phone... So I called a towing company that unlocked it for no charge to me. Masha'Allah, there are still some people out there who feel that a mother with a screaming toddler locked in the car is not a chance to collect $50.

In the afternoon, DH had a Drs appointment for a knee problem that he has been having. And they want to do a surgery on it. :P

Then all 6 of us are in line at Wal-Mart with two carts full of stuff and I go to pay only to realise that I have no cards... DH proceeds to get very upset that I came all the way to Wal-Mart without my cards. So I run back to the house thinking I will grab his cards and I find mine. Apparently, DH has taken the cards that I need from my wallet and has them in his car... Why??? Well, his cards from the same accounts are not working. I can only assume that he remembered that because when I showed up with the cards he was sitting at Subway with the kids eating dinner and he had even remembered the South Beach thing and gotten me a salad and a diet coke. LOL It was enough of a sorry for me... But I was a little flustered by the whole thing.

Yes dears... It was a Monday. Let's hope that Tuesday is a little more tame!LOL

Presentation

Layla's cultural heritage thing was Wednesday and Thursday... Since I've talked about it so much I thought I would share the finished project. Oh, and she wore one of my jilbabs. The funny thing was that of all the things we talked about she remembered one without fail. The Nile is 4,160 miles long. Funny what kids latch onto, huh?

Random Acts...

I have seen this on other blogs and I like the idea... So here it is. I have 5 things to give away to the first five people who comment asking for them. But, you have to remember to give me your e-mail so I can contact you for your snail mail info.

1)Something for a Muslimah.**UmmLayth**

2)Something for a person who is a kid at heart.**Amira**

3)Something for a person who tries to be green.**Rahma**

4)Something for an expectant mother (could be a new mother too).

5)Something for a hijabi.**UmmHana**

I will ship these things to you within a couple of weeks... All these things are handmade by yours truly;) So, don't let me down! Reply! Reply! Reply!!

Tag!!!

Mona (AKA MamaMona) tagged me sooo, here goes.

Assignment: Write 6 things everyone should do before they turn 18. Oh that seems so long ago...

Da Rules: List 6 actions or achievements you think every person should accomplish before turning 18.There are no conditions on what can be included on the list.At the end of your post, choose 6 people to get tagged and list their names.People who are tagged write their own blog entry with their 6 suggestions.Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged.

1)Get an education... And I don't just mean sit in school. Read, study a language, take outside courses in things...

2)Find a hobby that relaxes you, preferably something with your hands. Learn to sew, knit, paint, sculpt... Whatever. Just have something that you can learn and love so when you are an adult and you say, "I don't have time to take up a new hobby"... You have one to fall back on. They are great for stress relief.

3)Meet people from as many different cultures/backgrounds as possible. You have to get out of your little world in order to have an intelligent and rounded opinion in life. Cultivate it now.

4)Do something that takes you out of your comfort zone. I don't mean go do a pole dance at the local strip club or go on one of those girls gone wild tapes... I mean go to another country for the summer, join debate club even though you hate public speaking, volunteer at a nursing home even though you don't know what to say to the older generation... You have to learn to challenge yourself now before you get to old. Trust me, I have never seen anyone who never left their comfort zone run off and join the peace corp once they are 30.

5)Practice patience. You won't grow it spontaneously the day you turn 21. You have to learn to cultivate it now, and you will have a much better life if you can learn it.

6)Study world religion. Now, ah ah... Don't get all defensive on me about "You should be telling them to study Islam!!!" I am assuming you already know about Islam (although it doesn't hurt to brush up on the deeper subjects). But, if you are ever going to really have a conversation about why did you choose Islam... You have to have examined the other faiths first. I am not one for expecting people to understand our deen if we don't understand theirs.

I tag: hmmm, I don't know! Everyone has been tagged already!

THIS IS NOT EGYPT!!!

So in the middle of loan applications, selling cars and meeting with construction workers for the daycare this is the week that Layla's report on her heritage is due. On Wednesday she has her presentation and on Thursday we have to bring a snack/sweet that doesn't have nuts from the country she is presenting on.

As per my previous post DH was opposed (and still is) to the whole Egypt thing. I guess it comes down to feeling like the school has no business asking about relatives and family ties to other nations. He feels like they are gathering information from the kids in the name of education. I see where he is coming from. So, I bid on Germany but the teacher said that there are so many other people doing it that she would rather see Layla choose something else. So, I decided that there were some positives to doing Egypt and we are going with that.

I am going to try to focus on modern Egypt. Cairo to be specific (since that is where DH is from) and point out that it is a modern city blah blah blah. Maybe we can dispel some myths that Egypt is all about some guy on a camel taking tourists to the pyramids (although I do have the obligatory photos of said guy and me with my DD riding that camel). Since Discovery Channel and the like always seem to bring that. I mean, the average American probably thinks that Zahi Hawas is the only man that speaks English in Egypt!LOL

So, I am trying to think of something to cook... Grape leaves? Hmmmm. Also, I am going to play some modern Egyptian music. Hopefully my niece will be able to come through with some Mp3s for me. The one thing I am stumped on is clothes... She is supposed to wear something "traditional from the country she is presenting on. But what is "traditional" Egyptian dress? I don't think that DH will laugh if I put her in a jilbab, braids and a scarf with pom-poms around the edges!LOL I mean he's from Cairo guys... Traditional for him is what? A school uniform?LOL I'll have to think about that one some more. How can I represent without being all upper Egypt about it????

Where do we go from here?

I just got a phone call today from my 1st grader's teacher. Apparently he has been sent a disciplinary action form for the 3rd time... And this time he didn't bring it home.

**sigh**

I am ready to pull him from everything and move to a place where we can have a more peaceful, quiet life today. I am ready to chuck the ideas that DH has for all these business ventures and just run to Egypt and live by my SIL where I can have a simple existence. I think all the chaos in our house is at the root of this problem. He was fine last year.

So now I am asking myself should I push ahead with the plans we have... With the life that is keeping my husband in bed every hour of the day that he is at home? Or should I put my foot down and demand that things change? I have been seeing this anger in our DS... As a matter of fact I just spoke with my DH about it this morning over breakfast. He doesn't see it. He thinks our son is merely defending himself. I see uncontrolled aggression and I'm afraid it runs deeper than not liking school this year because I see it at home too.

I just hope our lifestyle (which is intended to provide a good life for our children in the future) doesn't ruin their lives now. I know it's been hard on me. I have been suffering from a deep depression for some time now... I can't let it touch my kids though, that would break my heart.

I think we are doing too much, fighting too much, and struggling too much. We need an easier life. We could have it. The question is will DH be willing to seek it?

Don't buy it!!! Make it!!!

The next time you feel the need to give the kiddos some playdough just make it yourself! I NEVER buy playdough;) You can even make your own and hand it out as party favors buy cutting it into chunky little shapes and putting it in little plastic gift bags.

Here are my favorite recipes:

Kool Playdough

3 cups Flour
1/2 cups salt
2 Koolaide packages
2 cups Boiling water

Mix the dry ingredients together. Add boiling water. Knead on floured board and add flour until desired consistency. This playdough will last for a long time when stored correctly.

Cooked playdough

2 cups flour
1 cup salt
2 tablespoons cream of tarter
2 cups of water
1 tablespoons mineral oil
food coloring

Mix all ingredients in a saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring until stiff. Allow to cool, then knead.

Another fun one is what I call goop.

Part 1
1 cup room temperature water
1 cup white school glue
Food coloring

Part 2
1 1/3 cups warm water
4 tablespoons Borax laundry booster

Mix parts in separate bowls. Pour the glue mix into the borax mix and don't stir. Just kinda roll it around until it firms up. Then take it out and knead it! Makes a fun gooey kinda dough.

Shoes and Souls...

So, Mama Mona (on the sidebar there) has inspired me to lay bare my shoe closet as I do agree with her idea that shoes can tell you something about a person... Here goes:


So let's start with my all time favorite since high school... Birks. Yes, I wear them all the time and with socks. Of course there are times when I have to leave them aside such as the dead of Wyoming winter... That's when I pick up these babies:


I also heart my Uggs. I have a suede pair like the ones pictured and a hard leather foot type to back it up on days when I can't wear the others. They are warm and comfy and wonderful in the winter.


Now if I must wear something that looks a little more formal I have my Dansko Professionals. I think they are comfortable and pass relatively undetected with a nice outfit. True story, I don't even own a pair of flats. I just wear these with dresses and everything. LOL

Someday I'm sure I'll have to grow up and get a more formal set of shoes... Then again maybe not. Oh, and of course my shoes are a dead giveaway that I am American wherever I travel... I don't think an Egyptian would even believe you if you told them what you pay for a pair of Birks!

Does not being able to get married make you a better Muslim?

Check out this article on the front page of the New York Times


There are two separate issues in the article as I see it, and the unfortunate part is that they have melted them into one... Well, and they made the return to practicing Islam in my generation of Egyptians seem like a bad thing.

I agree that the two main ideas that marriage is being blocked for many young people in Egypt and that many of the same generation are returning to practicing Islam are both true. BUT BOTH THINGS OCCERING DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE RELATED!!! Ugh. What's that they teach you in science about a positive correlation not always indicating cause and effect?

It is my opinion (since I can say that I have seen my DH's & SIL's friends all who married at a "normal" age) that there is no reason to believe that only people who don't get married are becoming more religious. All the people my DH grew up with are more religious now as adults. Most of them are more religious than even their parents, I know my DH and his younger sister are. I think that Egypt is just experiencing the normal swing of the pendulum when it comes to expressing your faith and practicing your deen. Now, I am no sociologist... But it seems like that is a natural thing in societies. We go from one extreme to another, and when the government came down hard on the brotherhood of Islam in Egypt it forced the pendulum to swing towards a very secular type behavior. Now, some of that has gone away and we are seeing people coming back to Islam for a variety of reasons. I don't think you can pinpoint it... For this guy maybe it's culture, and that girl it's political, and then that guy see's it as reclaiming something of his identity lost while he was young... Who knows. But to put it in such simplistic terms is well, being simple (which in this case means stupid).

I guess that I have a knee jerk reaction to these articles because on a gut level I feel like the implication is that Islam is for losers and if you were happy in your life you would never turn to this "extreme" religion. You'd just be happy like all those "moderate" (in this case I mean non-practicing) Muslims out there professing your Muslim identity and doing nothing different in your daily life because of it.

As usual, just my two piasters on the subject.

***Edit 2/19/08***
I read the article to DH and he had some thoughts. Mostly he wanted to say that not getting married until you are older does lead you back to the religion... Because that is what is at the heart of avoiding fornication. The longer you wait to marry the more opportunities you have to become sexually active and the more tempting it becomes. So, you focus on the salat, you fast you do dhiker. Basically you try to keep your mind off of this temptation.

He also mentioned that of all the things that are tempting this one is the worst, because it is a God given instinct and unlike drinking and other things that you might do in college this one could be legal under the right circumstances.

Finally, he and I have always talked about trying to be sure our children DON'T wait until their 30's to marry.

Anyway, just wanted to share the thoughts of an actual Egyptian male who DID wait until he was about 30 to marry... *WINK*

Dieting is hard!

I have been dieting for about a month (I think!LOL) and I just wanted to let you all know where I am at with that. The part about my dieting that sucks is that I can drop the first 10 lbs or so pretty fast, but the rest is an uphill road. So, I lost the most in the first weeks and now I am losing about 2lbs a week. I know that is actually what they reccomend... But it feels slow for the effort I have been making. Anyway, I know that I am not the only one on this whole weight loss journey... So I thought I would share, maybe some of you have had the same experience.

LESPORTSAC TOKIDOKI TRASPORTO BUON VIAGGIO BAG

I have not had a new purse in a long time. I have not had a REALLY NICE new purse since college. So, after several auctions... I finaly got the tokidoki bag I have been looking at!!! Yea E-Bay! I also won an auction on an expresso machine I have been wanting. So I guess now I can sip my homemade expresso drink in my to-go mug while I carry my new bag to take the kids to school!LOL

Building

Like many people who plan to move "back home" someday we have been planning to buy a building in Egypt instead of a house here in the states. Now, this all seems fine... But the details of such a purchase have been eluding us for the past 4-5 years. We talk to people, we consider, and then whatever plan we have gets pushed aside for other things. I am starting to wonder if it will ever actually happen!LOL I guess I wonder how we will ever accomplish this task. But, we are always looking at our lives here in the US as a stage and planning to invest in our future in Egypt. All our hard work here is for that Villa which we have never seen, and from my perspective at least, we don't really have the slightest idea about.

When I think about it, I wonder if we are doing the right thing? I'm sure there are other people who need things in this life more than I need a villa in Egypt. I don't even know that I have the right to such a house considering that the ummah is in a horrible state at the present time. Aren't there people in other nations that need food and shelter? Aren't there children whose parents can't afford to educate them? Aren't there families all over the world one step away from lifting themselves out of poverty and into a position where they could help not just themselves but others as well? Didn't the Prophet say:
"Muslims are one body. If any part of the body is suffering the whole body feels the pain."
And the Quran teaches us:
"And verily this Ummah of yours IS A SINGLE UMMAH and I am your Lord and Cherisher: Therefore Fear Me (and no other)." Quran 23:52

So, if we ever do have the money and the opportunity to build that villa... Insha'Allah we will make it an orphanage or a school for poor children instead... A clinic for people who have no money for medical care... A business for someone struggling to help his family escape poverty... In other words something that will help people in the best way we can. After all, we can be comfortable in the same apartment my DH grew up in, insha'Allah.

What do you think?

So, in my DD's school (as I have mentioned in the whole cultural heritage post) they are doing a unit on family and heritage. I have been OK with this until yesterday when my DD came home and said that the teacher insisted that she tell the class what god she believes in. Now I am a little irked by this, but apparently the entire class had to answer the question. So, I think it's not an appropriate discussion... But I might be inclined to let it slide. However, DD then went on to say that when she stayed late yesterday to finish an assignment the teacher asked her about it again. Now I'm mad. I am thinking about bringing it to the teacher and making sure that DD wasn't telling me the story in some way that makes it sound worse than it is... And then going to the principal with my feelings on 2-3rd graders entering into theological discussions under the name of cultural heritage.

I am not really prepared to put my daughter in the position of explaining the Islamic concept of God to her class, and as it stands I think she is somehow feeling like her classmates believe she is worshiping some foreign God called Allah. This really puts me in a bad position. So, dear readers... What would you do?

Another episode from Baba Ali

Go watch it!

But I'm not bitter...

We have been invited to an event today, an akeeka to be exact... And I don't want to go. I could think of a million reasons, but I think the sad truth is that I hate these women's rituals because I am bitter and jealous. You see I never had one.

I never had a big walimah(my MIL and SIL planned my wedding dinner and I didn't even invite anyone because it was so last minute and the whole thing was done w/o DH and I really being involved). And no one has visited me after any of my births. DH has never wanted to have an akeekah for our children... So I have never really had a princess for a day kinda experience to be honest. When my last child was born DH brought the kids to the hospital to visit me and we ended up in the family waiting room so he could take a nap in my bed. Our life has just not been conducive to these family rituals... We are always struggling, there is always work to be done.

Now, I don't wanna sound like I pouting (although I am!LOL) I guess I am trying to fess up. Yes, I hate celebrations because I am a bitter person who is just a little jealous. There, I said it. I feel better now.

Identity Crisis

My daughter has a "Cultural Heritage" project coming up at the end of February. She will have to set up a table and give a 10 minute presentation about the country her family is "from" (which can't be America) several times for a cultural fair that will be happening at her school. Groups will stop at each table and listen to the presentation then they will end the day by sharing food from each person's country. They have to do things like counting in the language of that country, singing a children's song from there, wearing traditional dress... Now, we are lucky in my estimation because we don't have to look back to a great great anyone... My husband himself can tell my DD about Egypt... I was all psyched because it is a fun chance for her to be proud of coming from such an interesting background... And she has even been there! But DH is boycotting the project. What's up with that????

Not at all Shocked...

You Are 96% Non Conformist

You're incredibly strange. And a weirdness like yours takes skill to cultivate! No one really understands you. And you're cool with that. You just hope you never have to understand them!

Are You a Nonconformist?

Yesterday I did the weekly shopping and found discounted blueberries at Wal-Mart and a flour grinding thing for whole wheat at the local co-op so I decided to make whole wheat blueberry crumb cake. Here's the recipe I came up with by tweaking a few recipes to add the whole wheat and fruit:

Whole Wheat Blueberry Crumb Cake

Cake
2 cups Whole Wheat Pastry Flour***
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp baking powder
4 Tbsp butter
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 cup milk
1 large egg
About 1 cup fresh blueberries

Topping
1/4 cup Whole Wheat Pastry Flour
1/2 cup packed Brown sugar
4 Tbsp butter

Heat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix flour, salt and baking powder and set aside. Then, cream butter and sugar. Add egg and milk to the butter and sugar mix. Then, mix in dry ingredients until moist (now it is important to note here that you may need to add a little milk if you live in a dry climate... Your cake should be like a muffin batter consistency if it is moist enough). Finally, add your blueberries and fold in gently. Pour into a greased 8X8 inch pan.

Now, take the topping ingredients and cut in the butter with either a fork or your food processor until the toping is crumbly. Don't overdo it!!! Sprinkle on top of your cake.

Bake for about 45 minutes. Top with powdered sugar if you like!

*** You will have better results if you use pastry flour. It is ground finer that "all-purpose" whole wheat. Most "all-purpose" whole wheat is ground for bread. For lighter baked goods you will want to use the pastry kind.

The importance of intention

After my hijab post I have been thinking about what it is that gets me about some of the things I see happening in the ummah. And the thing I am most concerned about is intention. I keep coming back to that as the root of all the things getting under my skin, causing me concern for my kids and the future of the ummah. Using the hijab thing as an example... I am worried that the intention of this type of hijab is to beautify, to fit into a culture... Not to please Allah(swt).

I am no scholar...Check out this article by Jamal Badawi for the scholar's thoughts on this subject. But, I just wanted to share my thoughts on intention...

“All actions are judged by motives, and each person will be rewarded according to their intention. Thus, he whose migration was to God and His Messenger, his migration is to God and His Messenger; but he whose migration was for some worldly thing he might gain, or for a wife he might marry, his migration is to that for which he migrated.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari, Saheeh Muslim)

Simply, if you are seeking the pleasure of Allah(swt) with your actions your reward is with Him... But if you are seeking the pleasure of people your reward is with them. Now when you think about this simple concept it will actually blow your mind... Because that means that you can't go to the jummah to please Allah(swt) and to further your standing in the community since you are running for some position on the Masjid board or something. How many of us have purified our intentions to that extent? Think of the following...

“A person learned [religious] knowledge and taught it [to others], as well as reciting the Quran. He will be brought [to the presence of God], and God will mention to him all the favors he granted him, and he recognized them. God will ask him, ‘What did you do with them?’

He will answer, ‘I learned [religious] knowledge and taught it [to others], and I recited the Quran purely for Your sake.’

God will say, ‘You have lied! Rather you learned [religious] knowledge to be called a scholar, and you recited the Quran to be called a recitor, and it was said of you!’ Then it was commanded [to punish] him. So he was dragged on his face and he was thrown into the Fire.” (an-Nasa’i)


Whoa, and what about this? I think it really shows how Islam emphasizes intention in our lives:

If somebody intends to do a good deed and he does not do it, then Allah will write for him a full good deed in his account with Him; and if he intends to do a good deed and actually did it, then Allah will write for him in his account with Him, from ten to seven hundred times to many more times its reward. And if somebody intended to do a bad deed and he does not do it, then Allah will write a full good deed in his account with Him; and if he intended to do a bad deed and actually did it, then Allah will write one bad deed in his account." (Al-Bukhari)


Of course as with all things in Islam, there is a great mercy to consider... I think of the following hadith whenever I get down on myself for not having more time for worship:

“If he is working to support his small children, then it is for the sake of God. If he is working to support his elderly parents, then it is for the sake of God. If he is working to occupy himself and keep his desires in check, then it is for the sake of God. If, on the other hand, he is doing so to show off and earn fame, then he is working for the sake of Satan.” (al-Mundhiri, as-Suyuti)


I guess what I am trying to say is that it isn't what people are doing as much as why... I worry about WHY they are doing these things. If you are doing things to please the people around you, there is no reward in it. Now I am not saying that I know what is in people's hearts, because I don't. But, if what I suspect is true... We are in some real trouble.

So, I am trying (and I hope you will to) to purify my intentions. I want to examine them, control them. This is not an easy task, but a jihad that must be undertaken by every Muslim.

Say: "Whether ye hide what is in your hearts or reveal it, Allah knows it all: He knows what is in the heavens, and what is on earth. And Allah has power over all things. (Aal `Imran 3:29)

Go ask Baba Ali!!!

Check out the new Ummah Films Ask Baba Ali... This is the first episode, insha'Allah there are more coming!!!

Family nights

This image is an update on 2/3. A picture of my cowboy boot cake;)

For some time we were doing fun Fridays around our house... And once the kids went to school I just kinda let it drop. But I have decided to revive the idea and make it Saturday instead. So, tomorrow we are having a western night. Big people will end the evening with 3:10 to Yuma once little people go to bed;)

I'm making a cowboy boot cake, sheriff’s badge cookies, BBQ with baked beans and cornbread, and maybe some bandana napkins... And I will serve it all in camping gear type tins. I think I will try to get some cheapo cowboy hats too, and have you ever made those paper grocery bag vests? I'm going to do those... Plus some sculpie badges that the kids will make.

Anywhoo, you might want to try it if you have kids who are young enough not to think it's silly!LOL I know I have fun with it!LOL

More photos...

Well I seem to be in a picture mood these days, so here we are...

Here's a doll I crocheted a few months ago. Yes I know, no face. I only like representational stuff like maybe buttons and I tried some on her and it just didn't look right...


Here's some steps in a little ground beef filled bird's nest bread thingi I made today... First you use a cookie cutter that makes a cookie about as big as your plam..


Then you push them into cupcake molds and fill the empty center with the graound beef mixture. You can either close the edges or leave them open at that point.


And, tada! All baked up!


And here's a crumb cake I saw on Mama Mona's blog that I just had to make today too... Even though I can't eat it since I'm DIETING!!!!

a couple of pictures to share...

Just wanted to share the day in pictures...

This one is my youngest standing in front of the washer crying as she ponders the fate of her blankie rolling around in the washer.


This is some one evening mittens that I made knitting with two needles... I was inspired by Surviving's craft blog to make some wool mittens for the kids and I found out they were quicker than I ever imagined! I found the pattern on
THIS SITE. I'm making a set for every kid, insha'Allah.

What is hijab?

There is no doubt that we women want people to look at our clothing and say, "Allllaaahhh! Where did you find that outfit?" And this includes us hijabis. But, we have to remember that the purpose of hijab is to protect us from people looking at our beauty... So does the new style I am seeing in Egypt protect or accent our beauty?

Is this hijab?


OK, well what about this?


Or this?


Now I am not an all or nothing gal when it comes to hijab. All I ask is that you understand the definition of hijab in your heart and mind even if you are not wearing it properly. You do what you can at the moment. It's between you and Allah(swt). So, if all you can do is loose clothing and tie your hair back in a bun... Go ahead, bravo. If you can wear niqab, good for you, bravo. I am not going to be the sister to even ask you about it and I certainly know that there are women in minimal hijab that are more pious than the sisters in full out niqab, Allahu'Alim. As much as I love to see magazines geared toward hijabis like the one I ganked these images from, I wonder if we are giving off the wrong impression about hijab??? Are we supporting sisters who wear it or chastsising them for wearing it and not still looking hot? Hmmmmmmm.

This is me at my walimah. I wore hijab... And my SIL was so sad when I didn't wear the viel she brought for me (one like in the above pictures) but I felt like I had to strike a compromise between looking good at my walimah and going so far from the principle of hijab that I might as well just take it off for the event (which was suggested BTW by my in-laws who should know better).


So I come to the questions that are milling in my mind as I read these magazines... Is the look of the stylish hijab a gateway for young women scared to go all out and look frumpy? Or, is it too tempting to let these images redfine hijab in a way that takes us away from its core purpose... Shielding our beauty?

When I think of hijab, and what is happening to it I think of a few verses/hadith:

Sayyiduna Abu Hurayra (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said: “There are two types of people who will enter the Hell-fire, whom I have not (as yet) seen: People having whips similar to ox-tails with which they will beat people, and (secondly) women who will be dressed yet appear to be naked. They will seduce men and be inclined towards them. Their heads will be like the swaying humps of bacterial camels. They will neither enter paradise, nor smell its fragrance, even though its fragrance can be smelt from such and such distance.” (Sahih Muslim, no. 2128)

Narrated AbuHurayrah: A woman met him and he found the odour of perfume in her. Her clothes were fluttering in the air. He said: O maid-servant of the Almighty, are you coming from the mosque? She replied: Yes. He said: For it did you use perfume? She replied: Yes. He said: I heard my beloved AbulQasim (peace_be_upon_him) say: The prayer of a woman who uses perfume for this mosque is not accepted until she returns and takes a bath like that of sexual defilement (perfectly).

And of course the verse that defines hijab in the Quran...

“And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear therof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands’ fathers, their sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers, or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons, or their women or the servants whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex, and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O you Believers, turn you all together towards Allah, that you may attain Bliss.” (Quran 24:31).

These are the things that run through my head when I look in the mirror. Those are the words that ring in my ear as I reach for the perfume bottle in my vanity. I wonder what verses are going through the minds of the people who make these magazines? Or is hijab for them reduced to a fasion statement?

****edit****
Since it was brought to my attention that I might not be clear... The first picture is meant to be a hijabi dressing up, I have no problem with that one at all. It was one of a handful in the magazine that actually were pretty much hijab for me.



5 things you may not know about toddler nursing...

Since I am currently nursing a toddler, I thought I might do a post about extended breastfeeding... Then I thought there are many great places on the web to read about it....Kelly Mom, LLL... So I will settle for this short list. And I hope if you are nursing a toddler you will proudly answer YES I AM! the next time someone asks you if you are still(insert surprised and annoyed voice here) nursing.

5. Toddlers will usually nurse less frequently than infants. In other words you won't be nursing every 2 hours if you have a toddler!LOL

4. There are many times that nursing is the only thing between mothers of nursing toddlers and insanity. Ahh yes, the power of oxytocin!

3. Other people might think you are slightly insane. Oh yeah, you probably already know that one...

2. Toddlers are still getting many benefits from nursing, emotional as well as physical. Three cheers for mommy's antibodies, yeah!

1. In many parts of the world nursing past the first year is (gasp!) NORMAL, and the World Health Organisation actually RECOMMENDS it.

What's up in Ummlayla's world

Well, I have been flirting with the idea of getting serious about losing some weight for a long time now... I hit 150 (and I am only 5 feet tall) which is more than I weighed when I was pregnant with my kiddos and I decided the time is now. So, I am doing the whole South Beach Diet thing, and I hate fad diets but I need a jump start really.

I am hoping to drop about 35lbs... Which will take time of course. I am also going to start going to a pilates class and maybe yoga a few days each week. I hate that I have let it go this far. But I love food, and DH does too... So our recreation is cooking and eating or even just eating out. I have never been this heavy and I am miserable with it. So wish me luck ladies! I'm gonna need it!LOL

Oh, any weight loss tips/thoughts/otherwise?

Computer trouble...

Well, that's not really what my computer trouble is of course... But something like that could and would happen to me! Once my computer was out of commission for 2 weeks because some little gremlins (aka my children) popped off all the keys while I was on the phone. Creative, huh?

Well... Right now I am having some trouble getting the lap top to hook up to the plug cord to charge the battery or just use outlet power... So I am looking to get it repaired or maybe just replaced so I can give this one to the kids.

Anyway, if I am neglectful... It's not my fault! The computer may just have finally died, or gone to the shop for a long rest! I think I am getting to that point very soon... We'll see how much longer it will hold on like this!

*****Edited on 1/7/08******
Well, thanks to DH I went to Denver and got a new laptop! Yeah DH! We were able to get some of the upgrades I have been looking for like a DVD burner and what-not... So it all turned out well in the end, alhamdulilah. My dad is fixing the old one to give to the kiddos, insha'Allah.

UmmLayla gets Mortified

http://www.getmortified.com/book/
I suspect that many of you fellow bloggers kept a diary/journal when you were you angsty teens... I think most bloggers are writers at heart, and many people who like to put thought to pen keep a journal...

Anywhoo, I wanted to share with you a book that I found at The Virgin Megastore in FL, Mortified. It's the journal entrees of teens and preteens that originally found life as a stage play. I really enjoyed it and it inspired me to go to my dad's house and dig up my journals that I kept from about 9-18 years of age... And in true keeping with the spirit of the book, I will share an entry from one with you:


Thursday, April 5th 1990
Well, all's quiet on the (my last name) front! Yesterday, I did well in the lacrosse game. I'm definitely not in danger of losing my position (as team goalie). And I asked Alex if he likes Jenna. He didn't even freak out he just said, "Yeah, but only as a friend." totally calm and serious. So I'm sure he's not lying. Oh baby, my man and my position are safe! At OM (Olympics of the Mind) Alex and I both cut our fingers up with those retractable razor blades while we were cutting some cardboard. It didn't really hurt, but my mom wants me to get a tetanus shot since I haven't had one in ten years and the razor was so dirty. Oh well, I'm sure I won't die. I'm getting lazier and lazier as the end of the year gets closer. Soon I'm gonna just veg out! Speaking of veggin out, just about a month ago I became a vegetarian. It may seem odd but I feel better and I feel like I'm not hurting anything for my food and that's a good feeling. I've pysched myself out so much to refrain from meat that even the thought of eating animal flesh appals me! It's odd, before I loved steak and chili and chicken pot pie and turkey breast. but now I couldn't dream of touching it to eat. But in science I'll still dissect and stuff, I have to!!!!! What good would a doctor who didn't be?

Thursday, April 12th 1990
Whoa! Today has been just a blowout! I went off on the OM team about screwing around and not getting anything done. And at practice Jill (the coach) asked Selena (a teammate) and I to talk to the lacrosse team about their "bad attitude" towards practice lately. I was glad though they all really shaped it up afterwords. OM was different. Alex has decided that he kinda likes Jenna. (Bleah!) So he has to show off for her and screw around and shit and I'm getting sick of it. He can be cool though. Like tonight he rode home with us and i had on glasses and he actually told me I looked good in them. It was cool. but his shit with Jenna is gonna piss me off. I just hope he'll get over it pretty quick. Jenna likes Jason anyway. I don't know, I hope he grows to hate her!j/k (just kidding)

Adult me says...
I was about 15 when I wrote those. See I told you I was a geek. Olympics of the mind and all! LOL Seriously, I never even dated Alex... But I would've been smart to, last I heard he was at MIT;)

____________________________________________________


Now fellow bloggers, I am challenging you to get mortified! Pull out that journal and post a page or too, come on. If I can do it you can. Leave me a comment if you are planning to do, it would be cool to make the challenge on your blog too if you do. I'm waiting!!!!

Name that Daycare!

OK, so we are all over the place with a name for the daycare... I think it should be a little cheeky... Or just a nod to the fact that it's a Waldorf style school. I'm extreme that way. No babyland, kiddie kastle, or anything cheesy like that for me.

So I was thinking of the name: Shmoosville, or Shmoo Valley as in shmoo from the lil'Abner cartoon. Check it out... Here's a shmoo site.

What do you think?

I think I need a faith lift...

Friends, I have a request. I am way out of the loop here in cowboy country. So if you hear of an Islamic convention, a learning oppertunity, a great book... Please pass it on. I am thirsting for Islam. No really. I am just parched. So give a sister a cool drink, huh?