OK, so I know that I shouldn't talk but I am going NUTS here. My SIL came for an unexpected visit (which is enough if you have four kids in 800 square feet) and brought all her problems and demands with her.
Last night she woke my DH after we had been asleep for only an hour screaming hysterically (not a good thing to do with a person who has an overworked heart and problems sleeping)... Why? She was cold and didn't want to get into her chair and go like 2 feet to get a blanket. The night before she called for me at 3:30am after a whole day of chasing kids and doing all the set up and break down for a day camping by the lake to get her tums. I was peeved and I stomped downstairs thinking, you had better be dying!!! She said sorry, and I felt bad that I was mad and at least was happy that she knew it was an annoying thing to do. But noooo, she had to continue "I tried to call you on your cell phone, but it was down here." Sorry for yelling, not for waking me at 3:30am. Now, this is funny because she is just like that. She sits on the couch demanding things all day, or sleeps. THIS IS NOT A RESORT!!!! I am not a place for her to crash and be serviced. She must be doing these things for herself at home because she lives alone.
Can I just say that this is not the time for this? We have so many things going on with the businesses and our lives. I am ready to have a throw down with the guy I am renting my store from. The permits for our property are taking an eternity. Our tax guy is sooooo behind I am going to have to go to a new accountant soon.... And so on. I need a break, and am in no position to give one to someone else right now. Sheesh.
OK, rant over.... Now I'm going to try to post some pictures of DD2 eating the cake we got her for her first birthday yesterday... Incidentally, she liked the bath she got after the cake more than the cake itself!LOL
Hadith about sisters and daughters
2 years ago
3 comments:
Salam UmmLayla. Her behavior is strange. What kind of health problems does she have? Or is she just so old? Maybe you can put everything she could possibly need at night in a basket next to her chair/bed? Perhaps it's because she's not in her own home that she can't get things for herself because she doesn't now where things are etc. Give her a tour and keep the things she needs accessible. You never know when you'll need a similar favor one day, so just try your best. I understand how overwhelming it can be, my in-laws were here for 2 weeks and i'm exhausted. But they're gone now and i realized that i had 2 weeks to peacefully breastfeed the baby without my 3 yr old whining and nagging. I like to think that whoever you encounter in your life was sent to you by God for some purpose. Take what you can from your SIL while she's here. May God make things easier on you inshaAllah.
JAK Mona, you are right... And the basket is a great idea. She has a disability (she's in a wheelchair)... But she also has a way of pushing people's buttons. It's hard to say when something is needed really and when it is a control issue. Also, it is impossible to make some important things (like our bathroom) accessable because we are in a townhouse with two levels now. She doesn't help at all, and since DH has so much fatique from his health problems he doesn't help at all either... So I guess I feel like hey there are two other adults here, why am I doing everything? And there are things that I wouldn't even mention outside my house that she does that really make it hard for me with the baby (leaving things she needs that are not safe all over the place mainly). Allah give me patience.
I try to let things roll off my back... And I too believe Allah sends us people for a reason... So I have to make the best of it. Alhamdulilah, I am thankful that my DH sees the problem... Because if he didn't that would make it twice as hard. I guess this is a good window into why certain things annoy my DH sooooo much. After years of being subjected to what drives me crazy in two days I am amazed he's not a hermit!LOL
Asalaam Alaikum Sister,
May Allah make this situation easier for you. Relatives so frequently have a way of being annoying and they don't even realize it. I am glad to hear that your husband is understanding about the situation. Inshallah, her stay will pass quickly and you can get back to a more normal household routine.
Aeryn
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