The thoughts of an American Muslim and mother of four raising her children in small town USA with her Egyptian husband.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Where do we go from here?
I just got a phone call today from my 1st grader's teacher. Apparently he has been sent a disciplinary action form for the 3rd time... And this time he didn't bring it home.
I am ready to pull him from everything and move to a place where we can have a more peaceful, quiet life today. I am ready to chuck the ideas that DH has for all these business ventures and just run to Egypt and live by my SIL where I can have a simple existence. I think all the chaos in our house is at the root of this problem. He was fine last year.
So now I am asking myself should I push ahead with the plans we have... With the life that is keeping my husband in bed every hour of the day that he is at home? Or should I put my foot down and demand that things change? I have been seeing this anger in our DS... As a matter of fact I just spoke with my DH about it this morning over breakfast. He doesn't see it. He thinks our son is merely defending himself. I see uncontrolled aggression and I'm afraid it runs deeper than not liking school this year because I see it at home too.
I just hope our lifestyle (which is intended to provide a good life for our children in the future) doesn't ruin their lives now. I know it's been hard on me. I have been suffering from a deep depression for some time now... I can't let it touch my kids though, that would break my heart.
I think we are doing too much, fighting too much, and struggling too much. We need an easier life. We could have it. The question is will DH be willing to seek it?
I am a mother to four wonderful kids and the wife to one wonderful Egyptian! We live in a small town in the Midwest and work in our small businesses. I am also a Waldorf preschool teacher and childcare provider, a backyard chicken lady, a part time homeschooler, and a generally crunchy mama (think hijabi in birks).